Having lived all my life in hostel's filled with boys..i was never really a "go-getter" in terms of expressing my feeling for a girl!...but since the time i saw the love of my life in my work place. she was all that i had imagined...her presence made me feel happy and kinda peaceful.I knew she was there and thats all i wanted..So, i was just satisfied looking at her and sometimes exchange pleaseantries...i would miss her so much if i didnt see her for even a single day!. i never thought i would be like this,for all i know, i was like the rock of gibraltar in college,never falling for a girl!..but she affected me so much...i didnt know why!!

So,after 9 long months,i had to move to a new job and the thought of not seeing her was just too hard to handle.One fine day(or evening,as i workd night shifts..), i saw her sitting in the cafeteria all by herself...so i took a cup of coffee for both of us, sat next to her and said "join me"?...she smiled and said "yes"...we started speaking and i told her i got a new job..she said she was happy for me..and asked me to come and sit next to her on the floor...so...for the last one week of my work i sat next to her and we chatted and got to know each other...and became good friends!

Then came the day when it was my last day at work....she asked for my number...(which i should have done long time ago)....from that day on we started talking on the phone and sent helluva lot of msgs..but i missed seeing her...i cudnt ask her out 'cos i workd days and she was still working nights and she mostly spent her weekoffs with her sis and cousins...but we did go out couple of time in the meanwhile.. u know like for dinner...

eventhough she never told  me what she felt for me..i was sure that she was the one i wanted to die with of old age!...so i told her how i felt,told her i was in love with her and said she was special to me.....

she told me she was going home for a month(up North) and her family had arranged for her to meet someone..(a proposal for marriage)....she wasnt sure what to expect but wanted her family to be happy and wanted to settle down for their sake...i didnt know wat to say either..i wasnt ready to commit yet even though i wanted to be with her...so off she went!

on my Bday,she called and wished me....and then said "I got engaged today"!!!!...i didnt know how to react...was kind of shocked but somehow i knew this was coming...so cudnt say much.she said she was coming back and would clear up things at work.

She came back and we met and talked and msgd as usual.Then she told me everything that happened at home and gave her wedding date!...I knew i cudnt do anything....so made sure her last days here were happy...we went out for dinners and we talked a lot about life and what to expect and how things could have been different if only we had more time...even though we cudnt be together anymore..we became really good friends.

Before she left for home..she told me she'll miss me and i deserve someone better than her...(girl u were so wrong!)....i knew she liked me..but she never expressed it and that sometimes pains me...

Today,she's happily married.As for me,i am yet to overcome...i think about her everyday...not just as someone i liked but as a friend...i miss her..i miss talking to her..i miss her lovely messages...i miss seeing her beautiful face..i miss the way her hair falls....i miss all the little things she did.....she was the first girl i ever loved(and will do so forever) and the thought that i let her go kills me...but life is not always what we want..sometime we have to be contended seeing our loved ones live happily...(tho....i feel like a loser sometimes!!)

may be someday i'll find someone who does affect me as much as she did...but till then i'll live with her memories and ....life moves on!!!

"Amor vincit omnia"

Regards

Glow